{"id":328661,"date":"2021-08-22T04:32:00","date_gmt":"2021-08-22T01:32:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/en.buradabiliyorum.com\/nerdwallet-my-friends-all-have-more-money-than-me-how-do-i-keep-up\/"},"modified":"2021-08-22T04:32:00","modified_gmt":"2021-08-22T01:32:00","slug":"nerdwallet-my-friends-all-have-more-money-than-me-how-do-i-keep-up","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/nerdwallet-my-friends-all-have-more-money-than-me-how-do-i-keep-up\/","title":{"rendered":"#NerdWallet: My friends all have more money than me, how do I keep up?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_85 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-custom ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<label for=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-item-6a3d82ae0627a\" class=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-label\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #dd3333;color:#dd3333\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #dd3333;color:#dd3333\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/label><input type=\"checkbox\"  id=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-item-6a3d82ae0627a\" checked aria-label=\"Toggle\" \/><nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/nerdwallet-my-friends-all-have-more-money-than-me-how-do-i-keep-up\/#Some_ways_to_handle_those_mixed-income_relationships\" >Some ways to handle those mixed-income relationships<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-6' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-6'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-6' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-6'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-6' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-6'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-6' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-6'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/nerdwallet-my-friends-all-have-more-money-than-me-how-do-i-keep-up\/#If_youre_the_friend_with_less_money\" >If you\u2019re the friend with less money<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-6'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/nerdwallet-my-friends-all-have-more-money-than-me-how-do-i-keep-up\/#If_youre_the_friend_with_more_money\" >If you\u2019re the friend with more money<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-6'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/nerdwallet-my-friends-all-have-more-money-than-me-how-do-i-keep-up\/#How_to_talk_about_money_with_friends\" >How to talk about money with friends<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/nerdwallet-my-friends-all-have-more-money-than-me-how-do-i-keep-up\/#Laura_McMullen\" >Laura McMullen<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<p>&#8220;<strong>#NerdWallet: My friends all have more money than me, how do I keep up?<\/strong>&#8221;<\/p>\n<h2 class=\"article__subhead\" itemprop=\"alternativeHeadline\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Some_ways_to_handle_those_mixed-income_relationships\"><\/span>\n  Some ways to handle those mixed-income relationships<br \/>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><\/p>\n<div class=\"column column--full article__content\">\n<div class=\"article__side\">\n<div class=\"container--sticky not-active\">\n<div id=\"cx-next\" data-nosnippet>\n              <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<div id=\"js-article__body\" class=\"article__body article-wrap at16-col16 barrons-article-wrap\" itemprop=\"articleBody\" data-sbid=\"WP-MKTW-0000374777\">\n<div class=\"barrons-article-ad-wrapper\">\n<div data-track=\"barrons-article-ad-wrap\" class=\"barrons-article-ad sticky_item\">\n<div class=\"barrons-main-article-ad-target sticky_target body_ad\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<div data-layout=\"\n                inline\" data-layout-mobile=\"\" class=\"\n          media-object\n          type-InsetArticleReader\n              \n              inline\n  article__inset\n          article__inset--type-InsetArticleReader\n              article__inset--inline\n  \"><\/p>\n<div class=\"media-object-article-reader\">\n<div class=\"audioplayer\" data-sbid=\"WP-MKTW-0000374777\" role=\"region\" aria-label=\"Listen to Article\" tabindex=\"-1\" id=\"articlereader\" data-show-title=\"false\" data-theme=\"wsj-article-reader\" data-show-header=\"false\" data-show-subscribe=\"false\" data-ads-enabled=\"true\" data-save-publication=\"false\">\n        <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p>       <em>This <\/em><a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nerdwallet.com\/article\/finance\/how-to-handle-mixed-income-friendships?utm_campaign=ct_prod&amp;utm_source=syndication&amp;utm_medium=wire&amp;utm_term=anne-stanleymarketwatch-com&amp;utm_content=1037658\" class=\"icon none\"><em>article<\/em><\/a><em> is reprinted by permission from <\/em><a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nerdwallet.com\/blog\/?utm_campaign=ct_prod&amp;utm_source=syndication&amp;utm_medium=wire&amp;utm_term=anne-stanleymarketwatch-com\" class=\"icon none\"><em>NerdWallet<\/em><\/a><em>.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p> Finally, as the country reopens, you\u2019re likely seeing more of your friends. Out with the video chatting and in with the high-fiving, hugging and, well, spending.<\/p>\n<p>For every dinner, there\u2019s a check to pay; for every wedding, a gift to buy; and for every concert, a ticket to score.<\/p>\n<div class=\"paywall\">\n       You may notice that you and your reunited friends handle these kinds of expenses differently. Maybe one of you sees an $80 night out as chump change, while the other feels like a chump for desperately needing that cash for rent.<\/p>\n<p>Here\u2019s how to re-enter the world of <a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/social-mediaa\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"1\" title=\"Social Media\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">social<\/a>izing and spending while keeping friendships and finances intact.<\/p>\n<h6><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"If_youre_the_friend_with_less_money\"><\/span><strong>If you\u2019re the friend with less money<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h6>\n<p>Reflect on your finances and priorities, as well as how they may have changed during the pandemic.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThis is an opportunity for everyone to be more mindful about where they want to spend their time, money and resources,\u201d says Kathleen Burns Kingsbury, a Waitsfield, Vermont-based wealth psychology expert and host of the \u201cBreaking Money Silence\u201d podcast.<\/p>\n<p>Consider what\u2019s important to you, she says, as well as the experiences you want to invest in and those you\u2019d rather skip to\u00a0<a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nerdwallet.com\/article\/finance\/how-to-save-money?utm_campaign=ct_prod&amp;utm_content=1037658&amp;utm_medium=wire&amp;utm_source=syndication&amp;utm_term=anne-stanleymarketwatch-com\" class=\"icon none\">save money<\/a>. \u201cThen you can decline invitations a little easier because you feel more solid in your decision,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n<p>Say you realize that during quarantine you didn\u2019t mind PB&amp;J for most meals, but you craved live music. Skip the fancy dinner plans and, if your finances allow, buy the concert ticket.<\/p>\n<p>Or make your own plans if you\u2019re simply longing to catch up with friends. Host a potluck, movie night, bike ride or another more affordable hangout.<\/p>\n<div id=\"cx-membership-tile\"><\/div>\n<p>With this kind of intention, you\u2019re empowering yourself to make strategic financial decisions. Doesn\u2019t that sound better than bailing because money is tight?<\/p>\n<p>As Kingsbury puts it: \u201cInstead of saying, \u2018I can\u2019t, I can\u2019t, I can\u2019t,\u2019 it\u2019s more about saying, \u2018This is what I\u2019m going to do.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n<p>As you reflect on financial priorities, consider creating a\u00a0<a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nerdwallet.com\/article\/finance\/how-to-budget?utm_campaign=ct_prod&amp;utm_content=1037658&amp;utm_medium=wire&amp;utm_source=syndication&amp;utm_term=anne-stanleymarketwatch-com\" class=\"icon none\">budget<\/a>\u00a0to match them, says New York-based financial therapist Aja Evans.<\/p>\n<p>A budget is a plan for your incoming and outgoing money \u2014 though you can call it something else if the B-word wigs you out. (Evans calls her family budget their \u201ckilling-it plan.\u201d)<\/p>\n<p>The key word is \u201cplan.\u201d No need to resort to a shrug or stress-fest when you\u2019re invited to a destination wedding or pricey brunch. With a\u00a0budget, you already have an idea of how much you can (or can\u2019t) spend on those activities.<\/p>\n<p>If you can\u2019t swing the event, trust that your friends will understand. \u201cI would imagine that, after COVID, people really understand financial stress no matter their level of income or assets,\u201d Kingsbury says.<\/p>\n<h6><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"If_youre_the_friend_with_more_money\"><\/span><strong>If you\u2019re the friend with more money<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h6>\n<p>If you can afford the dinners and concerts, then live it up, Evans says. But try to understand that your friends can\u2019t always join you.<\/p>\n<p>Be \u201cempathetic and compassionate and \u2014 here\u2019s the hard part \u2014 not judgmental,\u201d Kingsbury says.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Also see: <\/strong>The housing market is so hot, a burnt-out Bay Area home is drawing cash bids above $850,000<\/p>\n<p>You may not know your friend\u2019s circumstances. Many people don\u2019t share when they\u2019re financially stressed, Kingsbury says, \u201cbecause there\u2019s that judgment and shame.\u201d So give your friend the benefit of the doubt when she declines an invite.<\/p>\n<p>And give your friend something else:\u00a0time. As soon as you plan an outing or learn about a pricey event, tell them so they can try to plan for it, Evans says.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Also read: <\/strong>I cover most of my parent\u2019s expenses \u2014 what tax breaks am I eligible for?<\/p>\n<p>Even with that time, \u201cbe prepared that some people might not be able to make it work,\u201d Evans says. Allow friends to opt out or even participate in an alternative plan.<\/p>\n<p>So if you invite friends to a destination wedding, for example, explain that you know it\u2019s an expensive request and understand if they can\u2019t join. Maybe you and your friends who can\u2019t make the <a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/trip-and-travel\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"10\" title=\"Trip &amp; Travel\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">trip<\/a> go out to dinner locally to celebrate instead.<\/p>\n<h6><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How_to_talk_about_money_with_friends\"><\/span><strong>How to talk about money with friends<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h6>\n<p>These spending situations become easier when you and your friends can talk openly about money. If your buddy already knows you\u2019re saving for a down payment or supporting your parents, for example, she\u2019s more likely to understand when you pass on a winery trip.<\/p>\n<p>And if you discuss\u00a0<a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nerdwallet.com\/article\/finance\/personal-finance?utm_campaign=ct_prod&amp;utm_content=1037658&amp;utm_medium=wire&amp;utm_source=syndication&amp;utm_term=anne-stanleymarketwatch-com\" class=\"icon none\">finances<\/a>\u00a0with friends, you may be able to motivate and help each other. Maybe your friend knows of a first-time homebuyer program that could help you with that down payment.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Don\u2019t miss: <\/strong>I sold my house after my divorce, and rented a room from a friend. We\u2019re now romantically involved, but I still pay him rent<\/p>\n<p>But, of course, money can be a loaded subject. To keep the conversation casual, avoid having it while you\u2019re already out spending money, Evans says. (Or while you\u2019re drinking.)<\/p>\n<p>As for what to say, start with \u201cI\u201d statements, she says, as in \u201cI\u2019ve been looking at my finances and noticed\u2026\u201d With this phrasing, your friend is less likely to feel defensive or pressured to share.<\/p>\n<p>Or start with a more <a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/general\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"3\" title=\"General\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">general<\/a>, less personal chat. Share an article, Kingsbury says, or bring up the financial aspect of a <a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/news\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"2\" title=\"News\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">news<\/a> event or even celebrity gossip.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOnce people start to talk about money in general, then the conversation over time evolves,\u201d she says. And friends \u201cbecome more vulnerable and willing to share.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>More From NerdWallet<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul class=\"articleList\">\n<li>\n      <a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nerdwallet.com\/article\/finance\/4-cash-raising-pitfalls-and-better-options?utm_campaign=ct_prod&amp;utm_source=syndication&amp;utm_medium=wire&amp;utm_term=anne-stanleymarketwatch-com&amp;utm_content=1037658\" class=\"icon none\">4 Cash-Raising Pitfalls (and Better Options)<\/a><\/p>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n      <a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nerdwallet.com\/article\/finance\/smart-money-podcast-getting-ahead-of-your-next-money-crisis-with-michelle-singletary?utm_campaign=ct_prod&amp;utm_source=syndication&amp;utm_medium=wire&amp;utm_term=anne-stanleymarketwatch-com&amp;utm_content=1037658\" class=\"icon none\">Smart Money Podcast: Getting Ahead of Your Next Money Crisis With Michelle Singletary<\/a><\/p>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n      <a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nerdwallet.com\/article\/finance\/when-it-can-be-a-good-idea-to-co-sign-for-your-young-adult?utm_campaign=ct_prod&amp;utm_source=syndication&amp;utm_medium=wire&amp;utm_term=anne-stanleymarketwatch-com&amp;utm_content=1037658\" class=\"icon none\">When It Can Be a Good Idea to Co-Sign for Your Young Adult<\/a><\/p>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><em>Laura McMullen writes for NerdWallet. Email: lmcmullen@nerdwallet.com. Twitter: @lauraemcmullen.<\/em><\/p><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<p><\/p>\n<div class=\"byline article__byline\">\n<p>    <span>By<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"author  hasMenu\" data-scrim='{\"type\":\"author\",\"header\":\"Laura McMullen\",\"subhead\":\"The Wall Street Journal\",\"list\":[]}' itemscope itemprop=\"author\" itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/Person\">\n<h4 itemprop=\"name\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Laura_McMullen\"><\/span>Laura McMullen<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<blockquote><p><strong><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">If you liked the article, do not forget to share it with your friends. Follow us on\u00a0<span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><a style=\"color: #ff0000;\" href=\"https:\/\/news.google.com\/publications\/CAAqBwgKMLG0nwswvr63Aw\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">Google News<\/a><\/span>\u00a0too, click on the star and choose us from your favorites.<\/span><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">For forums sites go to <span style=\"color: #ff9900;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"https:\/\/forum.buradabiliyorum.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Forum.BuradaBiliyorum.Com<\/a><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>If you want to read more News articles, you can visit our <span style=\"color: #ff9900;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"https:\/\/en.buradabiliyorum.com\/news\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">News category.<\/a><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"color: black;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"http:\/\/www.marketwatch.com\/news\/story.asp?guid=%7B20C05575-04D4-B545-75B7-F9F5CC97B45B%7D&#038;siteid=rss&#038;rss=1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Source<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;#NerdWallet: My friends all have more money than me, how do I keep up?&#8221; Some ways to handle those mixed-income relationships This article is reprinted by permission from NerdWallet.\u00a0 Finally, as the country reopens, you\u2019re likely seeing more of your friends. Out with the video chatting and in with the high-fiving, hugging and, well, spending&#8230;.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":328662,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fifu_image_url":"","fifu_image_alt":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[70897],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-328661","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/328661","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=328661"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/328661\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/328662"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=328661"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=328661"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=328661"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}