{"id":343628,"date":"2021-09-23T23:40:47","date_gmt":"2021-09-23T20:40:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/en.buradabiliyorum.com\/dear-grandma-when-i-think-of-true-selflessness-i-imagine-you\/"},"modified":"2021-09-23T23:40:47","modified_gmt":"2021-09-23T20:40:47","slug":"dear-grandma-when-i-think-of-true-selflessness-i-imagine-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/dear-grandma-when-i-think-of-true-selflessness-i-imagine-you\/","title":{"rendered":"#Dear Grandma: ‘When I think of true selflessness, I imagine you’"},"content":{"rendered":"

“#Dear Grandma: ‘When I think of true selflessness, I imagine you’<\/strong>”<\/p>\n

\n The compassion you\u2019ve shown as a frontline worker during the pandemic, writes Kelsey Adams to her grandmother, is what society needs to rebuild\n <\/div>\n
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\"Kelsey<\/p>\n

Kelsey Adams (left) and her grandmother Grace Adams (Photograph by Jalani Morgan)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

You received your second COVID-19 \u00advaccine on Jan. 5. I had the date highlighted in my calendar. I remember closing my eyes and grinning until my jaw was sore after my dad, your son, told me the news<\/a>. I didn\u2019t realize it before, but I had been holding my breath for months, my body tense with concern.<\/p>\n

None of us saw last year coming; it seemed the pandemic had blindsided the world. You, and countless others like you, have helped humanity through it. We often speak about the sacrifices of frontline workers, but so many of us are shielded from the daily reality: we\u2019re not in the long-term care facilities or ICUs. As a personal support worker, you have attended to people who are isolated from their families, craving solace and compassion.<\/p>\n

My brother and I have always joked about the fact that our grandmother takes care of other people\u2019s grandparents, but the pandemic turned that irony on its head. You were working eight days in a row, double shifts. When your LTC facility was under-staffed, you went in on your days off or during your vacation. When you aren\u2019t at work, your phone rings with calls from residents who miss your presence.<\/p>\n

MORE:\u00a0A woman to her sister with cancer: \u2018For now, I thank God you are here today\u2019<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

My first question, in the rare moments I\u2019ve seen you in person lately, is always: \u201cWhen was your last day off?\u201d I know I\u2019m pestering you, but I can see the stress etched into your face, the sheer weight of the past year reflected in your eyes. If you were ever worried about getting sick, you never showed it. And miraculously, you never got infected.<\/p>\n

What you did show was fortitude and quiet strength. It\u2019s been deeply inspiring to watch you give all of yourself to the residents, to make sure they feel cared for, safe and loved. The pandemic has been a never-ending onslaught, but you\u2019re always there with a smile and comforting hand.<\/p>\n

But this is not new\u2014this has always been who you are. When I think of true selflessness, I imagine you. You are your name personified\u2014Grace.<\/p>\n

MORE:\u00a0Dear Mom: \u2018Please forgive me, I forgive you\u2019<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Grandma, you\u2019ve always been a hard worker\u2014to be an immigrant mother of four you had to be. Moving your family from Jamaica to Toronto in the \u201970s and building an entirely new life was a feat in itself. You held many jobs to feed, house and clothe your family, but I know it was important to you that your work held purpose. My parents told me how proud you were when you completed courses in 1992 and became a personal support worker.<\/p>\n

You and Grandpa built a glorious new life, with three generations to show for it. It\u2019s not lost on me that I\u2019m standing on the backbone of the life you created. I owe you all and thank you for laying the groundwork so I can dream and achieve endless possibilities.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been on the receiving end of so much of your love and thoughtfulness. From the very first breath I took, it guarded me. I was born prematurely, weighing just three pounds, and you prayed every night for a month until I was safely home. Afterwards, my mom started to notice that any necessities she mentioned to you would be there waiting on her next visit. You still do that today, silently keeping a mental tab of every potential need and surprising us unexpectedly, including the care packages you prepare for my brother when he\u2019s far from home.<\/p>\n

MORE:\u00a0Dear Lola Conchita, \u2018yours is the kind of love that\u2019s secure and selfless\u2019<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Your caring nature extends beyond family. I\u2019ve heard the stories about your open-door policy back in the day. Whenever any of your children\u2019s friends had less-than-ideal home situations, you welcomed them into your own without hesitation. I\u2019ve seen firsthand the way you lend a hand to everyone at your church\u2014how no one leaves your house empty-handed, the extra dinner you prepare in case someone stops by.<\/p>\n

We\u2019re in the last, long stretch of this pandemic and you remain a refuge and safe harbour for so many. But I\u2019m begging you to start taking more days off work.<\/p>\n

Yours is a legacy of empathy and altruistic service. If there\u2019s one thing your actions have taught me during COVID, it\u2019s that the only way we can rebuild when it\u2019s over is to see the uplifting of community as our collective responsibility. In small ways, every day, you embody the spirit that humanity needs to achieve a more equitable and caring future.<\/p>\n\n

This article app<\/a>ears in print in the September 2021 issue of<\/em> Maclean\u2019s magazine with the headline, \u201cDear Grandma.\u201d Subscribe to the monthly print magazine here<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n

The piece is part of<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>Maclean\u2019s\u00a0Before You Go series<\/a>,\u00a0which collects unique, heartfelt letters from Canadians taking the time to say \u201cThanks, I love you\u201d to special people in their lives\u2014because we shouldn\u2019t have to wait until it\u2019s too late to tell our loved ones how we really feel. Read more essays\u00a0here. If you would like to see your own letters or reflections published,\u00a0send us an email here. For more details about submitting your own,<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>click here.<\/em>
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