{"id":488705,"date":"2022-08-29T17:40:54","date_gmt":"2022-08-29T14:40:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/en.buradabiliyorum.com\/when-i-moved-to-canada-from-syria-i-could-finally-be-myself\/"},"modified":"2022-08-29T17:40:54","modified_gmt":"2022-08-29T14:40:54","slug":"when-i-moved-to-canada-from-syria-i-could-finally-be-myself","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/when-i-moved-to-canada-from-syria-i-could-finally-be-myself\/","title":{"rendered":"#When I moved to Canada from Syria, I could finally be myself"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_85 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-custom ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<label for=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-item-6a40f8f9d1535\" class=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-label\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #dd3333;color:#dd3333\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #dd3333;color:#dd3333\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/label><input type=\"checkbox\"  id=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-item-6a40f8f9d1535\" checked aria-label=\"Toggle\" \/><nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-1'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/when-i-moved-to-canada-from-syria-i-could-finally-be-myself\/#%E2%80%9CWhen_I_moved_to_Canada_from_Syria_I_could_finally_be_myself%E2%80%9D\" >&#8220;When I moved to Canada from Syria, I could finally be myself&#8221;<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h1><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"%E2%80%9CWhen_I_moved_to_Canada_from_Syria_I_could_finally_be_myself%E2%80%9D\"><\/span>&#8220;When I moved to Canada from Syria, I could finally be myself&#8221;<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h1>\n<div>\n                            \u201cI love living in a place where I can be free about my sexuality without being judged.\u201d\n                        <\/div>\n<div>\n                                                                        I was born in Khiyarat Dannun, a small village in Syria. I have 11 brothers and sisters; I\u2019m number six. As a kid, I loved watching my mother cook and helping my sisters do their hair and makeup. My mom thought I should toughen up, because cooking and doing makeup weren\u2019t things men did. My father worked in the United Arab Emirates as a math teacher. He lived there during the school year, so we didn\u2019t see him very often.<\/p>\n<p>In Grade 7, I was sent to an all-boys Islamic boarding school in Damascus. By that point, I knew I was different, but I didn\u2019t know I was gay. I didn\u2019t even understand what it meant to be gay. After I graduated, I studied Arabic literature at Damascus University and began to discover my sexuality. At the new internet caf\u00e9s, I could search online to find other people in the queer community. There were secret spots and underground parties where we could meet other gay men. We had to do everything in secret. In Syria, any form of \u201cabnormal\u201d sex is illegal, including homosexuality. I hid my sexuality from my family, too. I worried they\u2019d disown me.<\/p>\n<p>In 2014, when I was 28 years old, I was drafted for military service in Syria. But I couldn\u2019t do it. My only choice was to flee. I packed a backpack that evening, said goodbye to my mother and took a taxi to the Lebanese border, four hours away. Thankfully, I was able to get out.<\/p>\n<p>I stayed with one of my brothers in Lebanon for 10 months, and eventually ended up in Istanbul, where I volunteered for a local LGBTQ+ organization. One of my colleagues suggested I <a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/download-scripts-themes-apps\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"9\" title=\"Download Scripts &amp; Themes &amp; Apps\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">app<\/a>ly to live in Canada as a refugee, and I followed her advice. A few months later, my application was accepted. I was so excited. I felt like Canada adopted me. I didn\u2019t know much about the country at that point. I knew it was cold and thought it was near the North Pole. I figured it\u2019d be like New York City in the <a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/watch-movies-tv-seriess\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"8\" title=\"Watch Movies &amp; TV Series\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">movies<\/a>\u2014big bright lights and busy streets. Most importantly, I knew Canada would accept me and my sexuality.<\/p>\n<p>I moved to Ottawa in November of 2016. At the airport, I was welcomed by volunteers from a local organization, the Capital Rainbow Refuge, which helps LGBTQ+ refugees settle in Canada. I lived with two of the volunteers\u2014a gay couple\u2014for free for the first six months. Then I rented a room in a shared house in Centretown.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><strong>RELATED:<\/strong>\u00a0<strong>My family and I fled gang violence in Mexico and made a home in Canada<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>I remember the first time I went to a gay bar with the couple who hosted me. I thought it would have bright flashing lights, like a nightclub, but in reality it was just some men drinking beer and playing pool. I realized that being queer in Ottawa doesn\u2019t mean going to clubs and partying all the time. You can just go and have a beer or see a concert alongside people like you. I could go out anytime without needing to hide who I am.<\/p>\n<p>When I arrived, I worked remotely doing translation work for a company in Dubai. I worked there for two years, then I got a job at Max Ottawa, a non-profit that promotes health and wellness for LGBTQ+ people. I organize programming for queer newcomers and coordinate our volunteers.<\/p>\n<p>I was lonely in Canada at the beginning. Then, in 2019, one of my sisters got refugee status and moved here with her husband and four kids. One day, out of the blue, she asked me if I was gay. I said, \u201cWill this make any difference in our relationship?\u201d She said no, so I told her. It was a huge relief.<\/p>\n<p>I love living in a place where I can be free about my sexuality\u2014where I can wear my earrings, grow my hair and dye it, put on whatever I want without being judged. I\u2019m focused on continuing to build a good life here. I like biking and walking by the rivers in Ottawa and Gatineau. I enjoy jazz concerts in the city, picnicking with friends and seeing films at the ByTowne Cinema. I\u2019m still in touch with the volunteers who met me at the airport back in 2016. I\u2019m satisfied with where I am.<\/p>\n<p>I still miss Syria, but I don\u2019t know when I can return. Since I\u2019ve been so involved with activism for Syrians and the LGBTQ+ community, I\u2019m not sure if it\u2019ll ever be safe for me to go back. Half my family has left Syria, anyhow. My mom passed away, and several of my siblings have moved to Europe. The Syria I love is only in my head. It doesn\u2019t exist anymore. What I have left are my memories. I write them down and talk to other people about them. Sharing my experiences helps me heal.<\/p>\n<hr\/>\n<p><em>This article appears in print in the September 2022 issue of<\/em> Maclean\u2019s <em>magazine. Subscribe to the monthly print magazine\u00a0<a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/secure.macleans.ca\/loc\/MME\/head_subscribe\">here<\/a>,\u00a0or buy the issue online\u00a0<a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"c-link\" tabindex=\"-1\" href=\"https:\/\/canadianmags.ca\/products\/macleans-september-2022\" data-stringify-link=\"http:\/\/canadianmags.ca\/products\/copy-of-macleans-single-issue\" data-sk=\"tooltip_parent\" data-remove-tab-index=\"true\">here<\/a>.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/canadianmags.ca\/products\/macleans-september-2022\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-sizes=\"auto\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-1238787 lazyload\" src=\"https:\/\/www.macleans.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/08\/SeptemberCover.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"334\" height=\"455\"\/><\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p><script async defer crossorigin=\"anonymous\" src=\"https:\/\/connect.facebook.net\/en_US\/sdk.js\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><strong><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">If you liked the article, do not forget to share it with your friends. Follow us on\u00a0<span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><a style=\"color: #ff0000;\" href=\"https:\/\/news.google.com\/publications\/CAAqBwgKMLG0nwswvr63Aw\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">Google News<\/a><\/span>\u00a0too, click on the star and choose us from your favorites.<\/span><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">For forums sites go to <span style=\"color: #ff9900;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"https:\/\/forum.buradabiliyorum.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Forum.BuradaBiliyorum.Com<\/a><\/span><\/strong>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>If you want to read more <a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/news\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"2\" title=\"News\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">News<\/a> articles, you can visit our <span style=\"color: #ff9900;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"https:\/\/en.buradabiliyorum.com\/general\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">General category.<\/a><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"color: black;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.macleans.ca\/society\/when-i-moved-to-canada-from-syria-i-could-finally-be-myself\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Source<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;When I moved to Canada from Syria, I could finally be myself&#8221; \u201cI love living in a place where I can be free about my sexuality without being judged.\u201d I was born in Khiyarat Dannun, a small village in Syria. I have 11 brothers and sisters; I\u2019m number six. As a kid, I loved watching&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":488706,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fifu_image_url":"https:\/\/www.macleans.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/08\/myarrival_sept_2-766x431.jpg","fifu_image_alt":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[23261,39706,74605,132074],"class_list":["post-488705","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-general","tag-lgbtq","tag-lgbtq-rights","tag-moving-to-canada","tag-my-arrival"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/488705","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=488705"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/488705\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/488706"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=488705"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=488705"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=488705"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}