{"id":556826,"date":"2023-02-26T17:17:00","date_gmt":"2023-02-26T14:17:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/en.buradabiliyorum.com\/the-escape-home-simple-rules-for-happy-house-guests-and-hosts\/"},"modified":"2023-02-26T17:17:00","modified_gmt":"2023-02-26T14:17:00","slug":"the-escape-home-simple-rules-for-happy-house-guests-and-hosts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/the-escape-home-simple-rules-for-happy-house-guests-and-hosts\/","title":{"rendered":"#The Escape Home: Simple rules for happy house guests \u2014 and hosts"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_85 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-custom ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<label for=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-item-6a3dcd3a71ee3\" class=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-label\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #dd3333;color:#dd3333\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #dd3333;color:#dd3333\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/label><input type=\"checkbox\"  id=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-item-6a3dcd3a71ee3\" checked aria-label=\"Toggle\" \/><nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-1'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/the-escape-home-simple-rules-for-happy-house-guests-and-hosts\/#%E2%80%9CThe_Escape_Home_Simple_rules_for_happy_house_guests_%E2%80%94_and_hosts%E2%80%9D\" >&#8220;The Escape Home: Simple rules for happy house guests \u2014 and hosts&#8221;<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/the-escape-home-simple-rules-for-happy-house-guests-and-hosts\/#Tricks_learned_from_friends\" >Tricks learned from friends<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/the-escape-home-simple-rules-for-happy-house-guests-and-hosts\/#Our_house_guest_playbook\" >Our house guest playbook<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/the-escape-home-simple-rules-for-happy-house-guests-and-hosts\/#Timothy_Harper\" >Timothy Harper<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h1><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"%E2%80%9CThe_Escape_Home_Simple_rules_for_happy_house_guests_%E2%80%94_and_hosts%E2%80%9D\"><\/span>&#8220;The Escape Home: Simple rules for happy house guests \u2014 and hosts&#8221;<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h1>\n<h2 class=\"article__subhead\" itemprop=\"alternativeHeadline\">\n<\/h2>\n<p><\/p>\n<div class=\"column column--full article__content\">\n<div class=\"article__side\">\n<div class=\"container--sticky not-active\">\n<div id=\"cx-next\" data-nosnippet>\n              <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<div id=\"js-article__body\" class=\"article__body article-wrap at16-col16 barrons-article-wrap crawler\" itemprop=\"articleBody\" data-sbid=\"WP-MKTW-0001717956\" role=\"document\">\n<div class=\"barrons-article-ad-wrapper\">\n<div data-track=\"barrons-article-ad-wrap\" class=\"barrons-article-ad sticky_item\">\n<div class=\"barrons-main-article-ad-target sticky_target body_ad\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<div data-layout=\"\n                inline\" data-layout-mobile=\"\" class=\"\n          media-object\n          type-InsetArticleReader\n              \n              inline\n  article__inset\n          article__inset--type-InsetArticleReader\n              article__inset--inline\n  \"><\/p>\n<div class=\"media-object-article-reader\">\n<div class=\"audioplayer\" data-sbid=\"WP-MKTW-0001717956\" role=\"region\" aria-label=\"Listen to Article\" tabindex=\"-1\" id=\"articlereader\" data-show-title=\"false\" data-theme=\"wsj-article-reader\" data-show-header=\"false\" data-show-subscribe=\"false\" data-ads-enabled=\"true\" data-save-publication=\"false\">\n        <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p>       <em>This article is reprinted by permission from <\/em><a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/theescapehome.com\/\" class=\"icon none\"><em>The Escape Home<\/em><\/a><em>, a <a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/news\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"2\" title=\"News\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">news<\/a>letter for second homeowners and those who want to be. Subscribe <\/em><a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/theescapehome.com\/about\/\" class=\"icon none\"><em>here<\/em><\/a><em>. \u00a9 2022. All rights reserved.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p> We have always had a lot of guests at our little lake house up the Hudson Valley. More than one neighbor, upon meeting us, has remarked, \u201cOh yeah, you\u2019re the people who have all those parties.\u201d<\/p>\n<div class=\"paywall\">\n       As hosts, it\u2019s always exciting in the days before guests descend. We look forward to it in the days before \u2014 stocking up on supplies, deciding who\u2019s going to sleep where, getting the right food and drink for each person, planning out activities. For us, and many others, the opportunity to entertain a houseful of friends and family is one of the best parts of having a second home.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>When the guests actually arrive, it\u2019s always exciting. Car doors slam. Greetings are hollered. People lunge into hugs and handshakes and introductions. Everyone is h<a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/download-scripts-themes-apps\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"9\" title=\"Download Scripts &amp; Themes &amp; Apps\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">app<\/a>y to see each other, whether old friends or lifelong relatives or people meeting for the first time.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The first-timers look around and ask questions as we show them the place. They ooh and they ahh. Everything is so nice. Whether it\u2019s going to be a couple days or longer, we all look forward to that period of fun stretching out before us, that getaway from daily life back home.<\/p>\n<p>Yes, it\u2019s always great when people arrive.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s also great when they leave \u2014 when my wife and I can finally collapse on the couch and say, whew, that was a whirlwind. When we can stop answering questions and pointing things out and cleaning up. When we can stop organizing and asking for help. When we can stop doing things for everybody and paying special attention to some people. When everything is back to normal and calm.<\/p>\n<p>And then, as we recap and recover, we start planning for the next houseful of people. Despite all the work, and inevitable bumps in the hospitality highway, we\u2019re still eager for the next time. We\u2019re not gluttons for punishment. Instead, we\u2019ve found a few tricks for increasing the fun of a full house while diminishing the chances that we\u2019re going to end up grumpy.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rule No. 1. <\/strong>Don\u2019t try to do it all. I remember visiting a suburban house in London, years ago, for a birthday party for about 30 people. The hostess spent the whole afternoon in the kitchen, her husband ferrying full plates out and empty plates back.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>He urged her to come join the party, and she snapped, \u201cBut I\u2019ve got to get them their pudding.\u201d<\/p>\n<div id=\"cx-membership-tile\"><\/div>\n<p>I didn\u2019t say anything, but I thought, well, my pudding can wait. I offered to help several times, and so did other people. Nope.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rule No. 2.<\/strong> Give everyone an opportunity to help, but don\u2019t push it. The best guests will quickly identify themselves, and make clear what they can and will do well. We\u2019ve come to rely on some repeat guests. She\u2019s great at menu planning. He loves to show off his knife skills in prep. He will be all in on happy hour, but will also show up for cleanup hour. Some won\u2019t do anything for dinner, but will be front and center for physical non-kitchen tasks like moving boats or splitting wood or raking leaves.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>When guests are incompetent at assigned tasks, laugh it off and find something else for them to do. For the totally uncooperative, move on to someone else \u2014 and make a note not to invite them back.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rule No. 3. <\/strong>Don\u2019t let someone bully other guests, or you \u2014 in the kitchen, around the fire pit, playing corn hole or cards, or anywhere else. Step in if you must. Your house, your rules.<\/p>\n<h4><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Tricks_learned_from_friends\"><\/span><strong>Tricks learned from friends<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n<p>Perhaps our best trick was learned from friends who have a big country house in a small village in France. Their rule: if you\u2019re staying for more than two nights, you have to be responsible for a meal, from start to finish.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>It seemed daunting, but our \u201cdinner night\u201d turned out to be a highlight of that visit. Our hosts were happy to help us plan a menu, and then go with us to the nearby town for the food and drink. They gave us the empty plastic gallon jugs we filled up at the local winery, one with white and one with red.<\/p>\n<p>Our hosts walked us through the town\u2019s farmers\u2019 market and shops, helping with our French when necessary and explaining what we needed to know about quality and quantity and prices of meat, vegetables, mushrooms, cheese, bread, fruit and sweets.<\/p>\n<p>Back at their country house, the hosts supervised and helped when needed as we made the meal together.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>That was a few years ago. We im<a href=\"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/category\/social-mediaa\/\" data-internallinksmanager029f6b8e52c=\"1\" title=\"Social Media\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">media<\/a>tely embraced \u2014 no, stole \u2014 that concept of requiring guests to be in charge of a meal.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Our best example was a Christmas at the lake with our two adult kids and their partners. The visit would span all or part of five days: arrival day, departure day and three full days in between. We declared that each couple would not only be in charge of an evening meal on one of the full days \u2014 everything about the meal \u2014 but also post-dinner entertainment.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>And there had to be a theme for each evening.<\/p>\n<p>Fortunately, our kids were into it. They are good guests. (I am reasonably confident they got that from their mother.) The first night, the kids from Los Angeles set \u201cCozy Christmas\u201d as the theme, and treated us to a loaded baked-potato bar, followed by Chicken Scarpariello, with sausage and peppers. Cozy, indeed.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Their entertainment involved the six of us collaborating to set up elaborate multimedia backdrops, then shooting artsy photos that looked like we were posing amid the Northern Lights.<\/p>\n<p>The kids from New York chose a \u201cCaribbean Christmas\u201d theme, starting with drinks sprouting little umbrellas and a playlist of steel-drum Christmas carols. Their tropical fish stew was a fragrant blend of delicate and hearty. For entertainment, they screened a rare print of the original version of a 30-year-old movie that had recently been remade into a box office hit with a big star. It was a real treat to glimpse that bit of cinema history and see the inspiration for a current movie that was getting a lot of attention.<\/p>\n<p>Our theme was \u201cFarm to Table Christmas,\u201d featuring roasted lamb and vegetables, all local. After the dishes were cleared, I hooked up a compact tennis table set on the dining table and we had a riotous couple of hours of doubles.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n<h4><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Our_house_guest_playbook\"><\/span><strong>Our house guest playbook<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n<p>Since that Christmas experiment, we\u2019ve made it pretty much standard procedure for guests: If you\u2019re coming for three nights or longer, you\u2019re going to be in charge of a dinner. We\u2019ll certainly consult, and take you to the farmers market and the butcher shop and the fish monger. We \u2014 and by that I mean my super-baker wife \u2014 will probably make the dessert. And we\u2019ll probably be very present, not quite hovering, through the whole food prep process, pulling out the right pots and pans and platters or the required spices and seasonings.<\/p>\n<p>This whole system works well for us as the hosts. We don\u2019t have to closet ourselves away from the fun to get things ready. We can make the food prep part of the fun. I like to perch on a tall kitchen stool, not quite out of the way, and kibbitz. Or maybe lifeguard. You need a salad spinner? Down there in that cabinet. A meat thermometer? Over there in that drawer. And, oh yeah, I\u2019ll give that a taste test.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Some of our frequent repeat guests don\u2019t do the dinner rotation but have staked out other territory, like the two guys who always make monumental breakfasts. They glide through the kitchen in a pas de deux, anticipating each other\u2019s moves. With a nod here, a murmur there, the performance produces a late-morning meal that sets everyone up for the day.<\/p>\n<p>Our houseful weekends are now built around the meal planning. Guests enjoy the decision-making, especially if they have some specialty or if they are getting a chance to cook in a kitchen with a little more space or other people \u2014 like us \u2014 who are interested in what they are doing and willing to help.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Even playing a small role in a big meal offers a great feeling of spontaneous teamwork, and makes for a more memorable visit for all.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><em>This article is reprinted by permission from <\/em><a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/theescapehome.com\/\" class=\"icon none\"><em>The Escape Home<\/em><\/a><em>, a newsletter for second homeowners and those who want to be. Subscribe <\/em><a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/theescapehome.com\/about\/\" class=\"icon none\"><em>here<\/em><\/a><em>. \u00a9 2022. All rights reserved.\u00a0<\/em><\/p><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<p><\/p>\n<div class=\"byline article__byline\">\n<p>    <span>By<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"author  hasMenu\" data-scrim='{\"type\":\"author\",\"header\":\"Timothy Harper\",\"subhead\":\"The Wall Street Journal\",\"list\":[]}' itemscope itemprop=\"author\" itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/Person\">\n<h4 itemprop=\"name\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Timothy_Harper\"><\/span>Timothy Harper<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<blockquote><p><strong><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">If you liked the article, do not forget to share it with your friends. Follow us on\u00a0<span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><a style=\"color: #ff0000;\" href=\"https:\/\/news.google.com\/publications\/CAAqBwgKMLG0nwswvr63Aw\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">Google News<\/a><\/span>\u00a0too, click on the star and choose us from your favorites.<\/span><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">For forums sites go to <span style=\"color: #ff9900;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"https:\/\/forum.buradabiliyorum.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Forum.BuradaBiliyorum.Com<\/a><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>If you want to read more News articles, you can visit our <span style=\"color: #ff9900;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"https:\/\/en.buradabiliyorum.com\/news\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">News category.<\/a><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"color: black;\"><a style=\"color: #ff9900;\" href=\"http:\/\/www.marketwatch.com\/news\/story.asp?guid=%7B20C06575-04D4-B545-71A3-6C4CDD33386D%7D&#038;siteid=rss&#038;rss=1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Source<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;The Escape Home: Simple rules for happy house guests \u2014 and hosts&#8221; This article is reprinted by permission from The Escape Home, a newsletter for second homeowners and those who want to be. Subscribe here. \u00a9 2022. All rights reserved.\u00a0 We have always had a lot of guests at our little lake house up the&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":556827,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fifu_image_url":"https:\/\/images.mktw.net\/im-731722\/social","fifu_image_alt":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[70897],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-556826","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/556826","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=556826"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/556826\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/556827"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=556826"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=556826"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buradabiliyorum.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=556826"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}